When You Hold the Key But They Stay in the Cage: Reflections from a Root-Cause Health Coach
Sometimes the hardest part of this work is not the stories I hear — it’s watching someone live inside a cage while I’m quietly holding the key.
Not because I think I can save them.
Not because I know better.
But because I can see them — the version of them beyond the trauma, beyond survival, beyond fear. I can feel what healing could look like for them, if only they could take that first brave step.
As a Root-Cause Health Coach, my work isn’t about offering temporary relief or simply listening to repeated pain. It’s about decoding what the body, heart, and soul are silently trying to express. It’s about reconnecting someone to their own internal wisdom and to the Divine healing already within them.
Many clients come carrying years of unspoken pain — silenced by fear, dismissed by others, surviving in toxic environments. Some have never expressed their truth outside of anonymous spaces. When they finally speak, it takes courage. It deserves honour. But it also needs direction.
Many clients come carrying years of unspoken pain — silenced by fear, dismissed by others, surviving in toxic environments. Some have never expressed their truth outside of anonymous spaces. When they finally speak, it takes courage. It deserves honour. But it also needs direction.
Healing doesn’t mean reliving the past. It means reclaiming your power in the present. It means recognising that while your story matters, your identity is not limited to the pain you’ve lived through.
There are moments when clients tell me:
"I just want someone to validate me as a victim."
And my heart aches. Because I do validate the pain — but I refuse to let them stay confined by it. I see the victim, yes… but I also see the healer, the resilient woman, the believer who can rise, with Allah’s help.
It’s not easy to hold space for someone who isn’t ready to walk through it.
It’s not easy to stay soft when they shut down or step away.
It’s not easy to offer light when they’re still drawn to the dark they’ve always known.
But this is part of the journey — theirs and mine.
So I keep showing up. I keep holding the key.
I keep planting seeds, even if they walk away before they sprout.
To my fellow coaches, therapists, and healers — if you’ve ever felt the sadness of seeing potential trapped in pain, know you’re not alone. This is the silent, sacred part of our work.
And to those who aren’t ready yet — I still make dua for you. I still believe in you. And I will still be here… when you are.
Because we’re not here to rescue.
We’re here to remind you: you were never broken — just waiting to remember who you are.
Join Our Healing Circle
Receive healing insights, stories, and resources